On the menu today:
KOTH Alleycat starting from Plum Alley. Be there at five for registration/milling about; race starts close to six.
KOTH Ceremony. This time around the alleycat finishes at the famed Point 6 Productions (Physics Brian's warehouse) where the "crowning" shall occur. If you need directions here get into contact with me or come to the race because the address will not be posted.
KOTH Dance Party. I don't believe it necessary to explain this one.
As with all my alleycats I have to throw this in:
Don't be stupid, you know your limits better than anyone so respect yourself by observing them! This alleycat is an unsanctioned race through traffic and the likes, you know the laws, whether or not you chose to obey them is on YOU and if you get hurt/caught/ticketed it is no one's fault but your own. Please be careful and DON'T DIE!
To recap: Alleycat meets at Plum Alley around 5pm and starts close to 6pm. The cost is five dollars. There are a lot of prizes to give away. Race ends at Brian's warehouse where dancing/crowning shall commence.
The story that is King of the Hipsters, as told by Davey Davis:
"So, what is this King-of-the-Hipsters jazz of which I speak, you ask?
Pretty simple. Way back in the day, like, 8 months ago, Alex Haworth shocked and dazzled the world by winning the ever-so-coveted top prize bag in the Don Giovanni Alleycat. That bag, from Burro Bags, is huge, awesome, and custom, looking a little like this:
Now all these months later Al turns out to not like wearing a massive bag that calls him a 'FUCKING HIPSTER' in huge letters. Who'd a thunk it?! So we concocted up a little scheme:
From here-on, the winner of the Look-at-That-Fucking-Hipster bag will carry a hallowed Salt Lake City mantle, and be named, for a quarterly time frame, the King/Queen of the Hipsters. Heavy is the head that wears the crown, as they must wear the bag as often as possible during their reign. It should be used. Luckily, their reign is finite. Every 3 months, starting December 16th, the bag is passed to a new challenger in an event of the current champion's concoction. It doesn't matter what kind of event it is, sprint or drag race or alleycat or hill climb or tall bike joust or that game with spoons and eggs that Esther cooked up, it just has to involve bikes. The organizer of the race cannot compete in their own challenge.
Further, with the title of King-of-the Hipsters, the champion forfeits their privacy, and their phone number and email address are posted on saltcycle/facebook for all to see. In the event that they don't host their event near 3 months after their crowning, they are free to be subjected to public (friendly) harassment until the event is held.
This is the legacy, Saltcycle. A guaranteed bike event every 3 months, rain or shine. Use it well."
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